Friday, March 30, 2012

March Number

Our official March number is...

One of my favorite toys when I was about 7 or 8 was the magic 8 ball...to ask a question and get an answer right away (no matter if it was right or wrong!)... Oh how I'd love a magic eight ball right about now =) Of course, we would miss this faith journey if we knew when, where, what, who in all aspects of our lives! So we continue to wait, learn, trust, surrender, ask questions and simply wait for the time when the answers will be revealed! And you know what? As soon as we get our questions answered we will have more and He will be ready for us to lay those down at His feet too!

We got the sweetest present a couple weeks ago from Mike and Heather! I just love it and it's all Hungry Caterpillar. Diaper changing goodies, bib, burp cloths, texture toy... too cute! Can't wait to have a little baby bottom to use it with.

A few things that I've been really praying about lately is our little guy's birth family and especially his birth mom who is probably going through a lot right now. A lot of people don't realize there are two stories to adoption and our joy and answer to prayer is going to be someones deep loss. There is a lot of grief for all involved including the birth family, our son, us... please join us in prayer as we prepare our hearts for our little guy's story and how we will be instrumental in allowing God to use us to help heal his heart, mind, spirit and body.

I've also been praying about our transition plan for when we will be bringing our little guy home (won't be for awhile!) We plan on cocooning for awhile which basically means we will be staying at the house and will be limiting exposing him to new people and places right away. We need to establish the trust and attachment to us first and foremost... this is challenging for me for many reasons. First, we didn't do attachment parenting with the girls meaning I didn't wear them on me, they didn't sleep in our room, we didn't feed on demand, we didn't rush to them at every sound they made, etc. We will need to do things very differently for our son so he knows his needs are and will be met! Second, I'm not someone who likes to stay home =) I'm a go and do person so this will be hard and it will probably get a bit lonely. Third, I've heard from other adoptive families that telling people we need this alone time called cocooning can potentially be something that can be hurtful and they've gotten very negative reactions to it. I REALLY don't like hurting people's feelings or seem ungrateful for people's support and interest. Almost too my fault I care a lot of what people think of me. We have been so blessed by so many and can't wait for you all to be a part of the rest of his life! We do have to be mindful of this time as it will affect how he bonds and attaches in his future relationships - he will be our number one priority. I will write more about this when we get closer!

Ok - last one and if you've gotten this far you will be SO excited to hear I've been praying about whether or not to induce lactation or not (see aren't you glad you kept reading?). I'm part of an adoptive mom's breastfeeding group and learning a lot. I want to be doing it all for the right reasons and above all to do it for his benefit and what it best for him! Praying for wisdom and discernment in this area!

Alright - thanks for hanging in this long. I don't get to share a lot of this with people and this is such a great way to express myself, inform a lot of people at once and to ask you all for prayer!! Please pray that we get our referral call and get a court date by August so that we don't get caught in the court closures. If we don't get a court date in August or before we won't be traveling for the first time until November which means he probably won't be home by Christmas. Just thinking that makes my heart heavy but I know that although I'd like a magic eight ball, I'm much better putting my life in our almighty Father who can work miracles and move mountains!

2 comments:

Meredith Kelly said...

Kathryn,
You are so faithful and strong! I look up to you and how you are handling things. You ARE his mom and your gut will tell you what to do (or rather the Holy Spirit). Try not to feel guilty about your decisions, true friends will totally understand! Your little boy is so blessed to get you (and your family)!!

rachel said...

Kathryn, I came to check in on your progress - You're getting so close!

I'm sure lots of people will give you their opinions, :) but I think one of the great things about attachment parenting and wearing your baby is that you have a lot of freedom to do what you want. I can be at Indigo's preschool for special events and the baby can sleep in the sling. I don't have to be confined at home. If you're one to go stir crazy, you might enjoy wearing the baby while you go out, just not letting others hold the baby. Or you and N can take turns if you need to get out and the baby doesn't do well out.

When the time comes, if you have any questions about adoptive breastfeeding, I would be happy to help. I tried to breastfeed E and I had a milk supply from Indi, but E had too many sensory issues and we were not successful. Interestingly, being we did do attachment parenting with the other kids, E was not interested in it. It was all too much for her. I think that was what surprised me the most. I thought I had all of these great tools in my toolbox, but her needs were such that she just wasn't ready... then. She is doing SO GREAT now. It's so wonderful.

So excited - you're so close now!